We queer people, live in dangerous times.

We've been on troubled waters before. To people of a certain age, the increased hatred and efforts to erase us from the landscape is nothing new. There's a generation that has grown up not knowing the shame and humiliation we endured.

There's always a segment of queer people living in fear of discovery.

There are always queer youth who refuse to live in a world that hates them.

In the 1980s and 90s, we were queers and fags. We did a lot of dying. When tens of thousands of men die, without the powers that be raising a finger to help in any way, that's called genocide.

Our government proudly ignored dying queers. They wanted us all dead.

HIV/AIDS was an equalizer. People began to realize queers were their sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, and friends.

Most people didn't know they knew one.

* * * * * * * * * *

Sign of the Times

Today, October 7, 1998, dateline Laramie, Wyoming,

This morning a bicyclist was riding in rural Wyoming, outside of Laramie.

"At first I At thought it was a scarecrow. I saw the blood and rushed to see if I could help him."

Matthew Shepard, 21-year-old college student at Wyoming University had been savagely beaten and left tied to a fence to die.

This report went around the country and around the world by Thursday that week. The story had everything. It involved a man who had his whole life ahead of him. It was a terribly violent attack done by two boys Matthew's age. It offered the fear evoked by man's inhumanity to man.

By Thursday, the entire world was watching while praying for Matthew, who was in a Fort Collins, Colorado trauma center.

All we were told was, "Matthew Shepard continues the fight for his life."

It wasn't known right away that Matthew was a gay man. It was well known by weeks end. Matthew was still alive on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday, according to the nightly news.

On Sunday, he was still alive. People everywhere checked to see how he was today.

On Monday, October 12, 1998, beautiful young Matthew died.

Matthew Shepard, forever 21

It wasn't a case that baffled the police. People saw Matthew get into a car with Aaron McKinney and Russell Henderson, well known Laramie boys. They drove off on a nightmare ride that ended with Matthew tied to that fence.

McKinney was found guilty of Matthew's murder. Henderson testified against McKinney to avoid the death penalty, and McKinney's trial was a death penalty case.

When it came time for sentencing, Matthew's father spoke.

'Don't give this boy the death penalty. Matthew wouldn't want the death penalty.'

Grace in the worst of times.

Matthew's funeral was big and dignified, although the unfortunate members of the Westboro Baptist Church carried signs, 'God Hates Fags."

The lowest of the human species making judgement on decent people?

Matthew had his angels that day. As his funeral Procession passed the Westboro Klan, a bevy of friends held high angel's wings they made for the occasion. They were expecting the display from the Phelps. The Shepards didn't see the signs behind those angel's wings.

* * * * * * * * * *

AIDS

By the time of Matthew's murder, people knew members of their family or friends who were queer. It was hard to hide the dying. AIDS was taking a large toll on gay men in the 1980s and 1990s. It became impossible to ignore the dead and dying tumbling out of their closets. It could have been a reason why Matthew's murder caught the attention of the world. It was the first murder of a gay man so extensively covered in my lifetime.

Attitudes had begun to soften. All people no longer wanted all the queers to die.

My best friend in the 1960s and often my roommate, Donnie Ashworth, died of AIDS. You won't find his name on the list of HIV deaths, because he died of a brain tumor, February 2, 1992. He went home to die in his mother's living room. She bought a hospital bed.

Donnie was the most dynamic and outgoing man I knew. He took careful care of his body, always looking like he just came from the gym. No one didn't like Donnie. In 1991 he told friends in Atlanta, "I think I got this thing."

Donnie went home to die. His robust 160 pound body melted to 88lbs when he died. He'd wasted away as gay men often did, but he didn't die of AIDS. His people instructed the family doctor, 'Don't put that awful thing on his death certificate. He died of a brain tumor.''

A lot of doctors didn't put AIDS as the cause of death. There were a lot of brain tumors, and pneumonia that carried away a lot of gay men. So, when you read the statistics about how many gay men died of AIDS, bump it by thousands and thousands who didn't die of AIDS.

They forced Donnie back in his closet after 30 years. They saved themselves a lot of embarrassment by doing it. I don't know how embarrassed Donnie was about dying.

AZT was available in 1992, but it was for AIDS, and Donnie didn't have AIDS, and so he didn't get AZT, and he died. If he hadn't died, he'd have been hell on wheels as a senior.

Donnie Ashworth, forever 49

* * * * * * * * * *

Civil Rights

A slowly changing attitude about queers made LGBTQ+ people a more acceptable way to go. The Q word was out, unless you were queer, and coming out might not be wise if you lived where preachers and politicians encouraging hatred of queers and fags

Jesus would be so proud they named their religion after him while ignoring everything he said and did. Jesus would have been the first to embrace queer people. Jesus would have walked with us, and we'd probably walk with him.

* * * * * * * * * *

Civil Rights

Actually, getting rights in a place where some people have them, but the people who have them don't want anyone different getting them, is strange indeed. We are all different.

The Defense of Marriage Act was passed in 1996, John Lewis said, "This is a bill of hatred."

People were beginning to realize that civil rights weren't merely a black issue. Anyone discriminated against by the powers that be were in the fight.

By the late 1990s, after a break that went on since the 60s, civil rights became an issue again. You wouldn't have noticed in California when Prop 8 denied gay people the right to marry on a ballot measure voted on by the citizens of the state in 2008.

California, beacon of liberalism, embarrassed itself that day.

Massachusetts law against same sex marriage, ruled unconstitutional on May 17, 2004.

The first domino had fallen, but it wouldn't be until 2015 before the Supreme Court ruled that gay marriage was the law of the land.

Shortly, equal marriage is going to be sent back to the states. Cases are already being prepared to challenge gay marriage. This Supreme Court will not overturn Obergefell, they let the states decide if they want to keep equal marriage legal or not.

If you are married to a same sex partner, you need to protect yourselves in the event of illness or death, because the usual states are going to override your rights. Your partner's family will be given the say on his treatment or what to do with your partner's body. You might not even be allowed in your spouse's hospital room if his people have a backward attitude concerning LGBTQ+ relatives.

Once the Supremes send this back to the states, attorneys are going to be available to answer questions and help you protect yourself. HRC will probably head this information network so that gay married people aren't divorced from their rights, if they don't, force them to respond to the need of gay married folks. It is part of their job.

If you have children with your spouse, they will be coming for you. The usual suspects will take your children away from you. Remember, cruelty is the point. If you are gay married with children, move out of hostile states. Think about staying in place and having your life destroyed as well as your children's lives. Think about it before it's too late.

This too shall pass, but until it does this dystopian nightmare is going to destroy lives. Don't let it destroy yours. When sanity returns, things may reset, or they may not. It took fifty years for us to go from criminals to equality in marriage. It might not be on the top of any politician's list to make equality the issue they tackle first after much of what made America America has been destroyed.

If you aren't a fighter, find the fighters and assist them. If we don't stand together now, it might be generations before we dare to stand up again. They want to make homosexuality a crime again. Remember, cruelty is the point. Don't underestimate the enemy.

Today they came for the immigrant, tomorrow, they may be coming for you.

Queers and faggots have come a long way. We can proudly stand and say we are queer. That once wasn't a good idea. If we don't stand together, it may be generations before we dare to be identified as LGBTQ+.

These are the same people who danced on the graves of dead gay men. These are the people who let a bloodborne disease run rampant in America, because it was killing the right people. If you think they aren't capable of even greater violence against us, you aren't living in the world I'm living in.

* * * * * * * * * *

In the past 30 years, I've spent my time writing stories that talk of the gay condition as I've known it. Rick Beck Stories in a browser will get you a list of sites where my work is posted.

I started writing gay literature because when I went in search of gay love stories on the Internet in the 1990s, I found none. I began posting gay love stories that told the story of gay men I'd known and the places where we could be found. Everywhere!

I've been joined by thousands of gay authors. They write truly wonderful tales. Some of these writers have the kind of talent that could earn them the big bucks, but they still take time out to post tales that might offer hope and encouragement to their people.

Don't allow the history that has been compiled at gay literary sites that document who we are as a people disappear. They may well come for gay literary sites and the people who have defined us and offer positive images of who we are as a people.

Preserve gay literature! This is your mission, should you accept it. Don't allow gay literature to disappear into the darkness that threatens all decent people.

Tarheel Writer - My Home

Jevic presents wonderful stories young gay people can identify with. Gay adults, friends of gays, or gay curious can find stories that give an honest look at the gay condition. I love Tarheel Writer because of how Jevic presents my work. He understands what I'm doing, because he's doing it too. Thank you Jevic for taking good care of my words.

Castle Roland - Herald's gay literature for all seasons. Al knows what he likes, and he likes stories that give the gay condition depth and a texture that comes from real life. Thanks Al for hosting my work and the work of so many wonderful authors.

IOMfAtS - It's Only Me from Across the Sea is one of the oldest gay literary sites on the Internet. Timmy was reading my earliest gay love stories. He's conservative and definitely has his finger on the pulse of what it means to be gay. You'll smile when you visit his site.

Awesome Dude is where I began posting my first mainstream gay love stories. Mike, was a tough taskmaster. He didn't take something because I sent it to him. He often fussed about content, before posting what I wrote. I was told by my friend, Jack Beach, "Awesome Dude is where you need to post your stories." I took his advice. Mike, The Dude, only posted the best author's tales. His readers expected quality stories. The Dude delivered.

The Dude died in September of 2023. His site still stands with all those tales he selected to present to his readers. He is missed, as cantankerous as he could be, Mike was the real deal. His insistence on perfection advances the quality of the gay literature being written.

Tickie Stories - You need to visit here before the site goes dark. The month before The Dude died, Chuck, a dependable webmaster who posted stories every week for years, stopped posting stories. No one knows what happened to Chuck. He is missed, but as time passes, the old guard, the writers, the webmasters, are aging out. Chuck's site is worth the time.

Gay Demon - European, as is IOMfAtS - I was fascinated by this website. I posted complete novels when most writers posted a chapter at a time. Of course, as a prolific writer, I have tons of gay novels and stories in my files. I only got part of my library of work posted when Gay Demon became a porn site, no literature. Each time I tried to log on to post, I got porn. Sad but true. Nothing is forever, but if you can find Gay Demon's literature, it's varied and worth the time it takes to look it over.

The Story Lovers site is a site I couldn't resist. Like with other sites, I can't post there because I'm visually impaired and Story Lovers doesn't make it easy to post there. I've almost completed the three books in my Indian Chronicles, and I'll once again try to get them to Story Lovers. Who can't love Story Lovers name?

Gay Authors - Another place impossible to post if you're blind and of a certain age. I was in contact with the powers that be there. They said they'd get back to me. That was five years ago. I'm not holding my breath. I have gotten mixed reviews on Gay Authors.

This is my story. I'm sticking to it.

I've been writing for you for closing in on 30 years. My longest lasting editor, Jerry, once told me, while we were working on my Gulf Series, 'If you wrote straight stories, you'd be a well known author.'

I don't write stories for straight people. I write gay love stories, and if anyone knows I'm here, they're keeping it a secret, but I keep writing.

When I started this, when I went in search of gay literature and found none, I decided to put something in the emptiness. I didn't know if I could write. I wrote stories for my people to offer hope and encouragement. I'm still writing to you.

I asked for one thing when I started this, "Please, don't let me end up living under a bridge."

So far, so good.

Thank you, Bill.

Peace & Love,

Rick Beck Rick Beck

Send Rick an email at quillswritersrealm
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