The north pond had been repaired, the new dike seeded and water was beginning to fill it back in, it had taken Jim and Brad a lot of work to get it ready once again. But they manned the pumps and water once again arched out across the corn. Tally and I were spending the week following the bailer from field to field. Tossing bales of hay up on a trailer behind the small tractor was hard work; I broke apart about six of them right off.

"Take it easy, you're throwing too hard," Tally said. "You're gonna wear yourself out way too fast."

"OK, I get it," I said, panting from the effort. Tally made it look easy, that was my problem, I was trying to keep up with him.

Paulo had moved on to another field as Tally and I filled the trailer. Worse was that I knew it was all going back to the barn where it would have to be stacked. Even worse, now I itched all over from the straw. At least Tally had his medicine, I just sneezed.

Rick's pickup bounced and jiggled as he made his way across the stubble to our location. He jumped out the truck and came running over to me, grabbing me in a bear hug and spinning us around.

"She isn't ... isn't ... isn't," He yelled. "I could kiss you, Evan."

Tally stood there with his mouth open and I grinned as Rick put me down.

"Congratulations, just be more careful next time," I offered.

"Hell yeah. And thank you ... Thank you both for covering my ass. Gotta run," Rick said. He was back in the truck and bouncing away before I could say anything else. Tally tilted his head to one side and smiled.

"Just trying to imagine you with Rick's lips on your butt ... What was that all about?"

"What I couldn't talk about yesterday. Rick thought he'd made Marlene pregnant, a test just proved she wasn't," I said.

"Lord, no wonder he got drunk," Tally said. "Never gonna be a problem for me."

"Yeah, you got that right," I replied.

We pulled the trailer back to the barn and unloaded, more hot and sweaty work. Wearing a long sleeve shirt in ninety degree heat was absurd; the alternative was getting bits of hay embedded in my arms. The cutting made the ends sharp, without gloves and the shirt for protection it would be like grabbing a bale of knives.

Back for more bales, and this went on all afternoon until I was exhausted. By four we had the two cut fields stripped, there would only be more tomorrow. We left the bales behind and stood just inside the barn door, reluctant to step outside in the sun. Tally had stripped off his shirt, leaving him bare-chested. The exercise had left him all pumped up and his muscles gleamed with sweat. It was like looking at a totally new Tally.

I could see he would develop a lot like his brothers, six foot something with broad shoulders and strong arms. But none of them had much in the way of body hair; I didn't think Rick or Barry shaved but once a week. I loved that smooth chest on my boy, and he damn well knew it.

"Like what you see?" Tally asked, the question followed by a significant leer.

"See? See what?" I teased. "Oh, yeah ... baby looks hot."

He slid into my arms for a hug and was about to kiss me when Rick and Barry walked through the door. I moved my head to the side avoiding the kiss and Tally's face went to my shoulder.

"Oh yeah, get some of that sugar," Barry laughed.

"You guys look beat, why don't you go for a swim?" Rick suggested.

"Soon as we catch our breath," I said. "I think Tally had a bit too much sun today."

OK, it was a desperate move to deflect the near miss. Two seconds later and Tally's lips would have been sealed to mine. How could we be so stupid?

"Tally, you OK?" Rick asked.

"I did feel a little faint, must be those damn pills," Tally replied.

"Sure it wasn't Evan givin you a little lovin?" Barry said.

"Fuck off, Barry ... Leave them alone," Rick said.

"Whatever," Barry said, heading back towards the milking shed.

"He can be an ass sometimes, sorry Evan," Rick said. He smiled and then followed his brother; they had the milking duty this afternoon.

"I think he knows," I said.

"Then he did see us in the river yesterday ... Damn," Tally said.

"Then maybe he won't say anything ... Does he care?" I asked.

"I think he likes you, we did help him out. Rick won't forget if he saw something, he just won't use it against us. Barry is another matter, but Rick won't tell him if he knows."

"Twins but not close, huh?"

Tally smiled. "They've been thrown together their entire lives; I imagine that gets pretty old. Rick is the leader; Barry just seems to follow along. I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking."

"My fault too, we were just being dumb. Somehow I think if Rick knows something he'll tell me, we'll find out. So, shower or swim?" I asked.

"Swim, I need to wash this damn hay out of my head," Tally said.

This time we went in the house for towels and a bar of soap, water alone wouldn't take away the stink of our sweat. I had smelled Tally all day; his scent came to me every time we got close. I knew how bad I could stink; it wasn't like that at all with him. It only served to turn me on.

As I lay back in the river Tally held my hands to keep me from drifting away. The current was strong today and we both had to fight to stand up. But we washed off the day's sweat and heat in the cool water and soon sat on the bank watching the shadows change in the trees.

"I start school in two weeks, I'm gonna miss sittin here like this," Tally said.

"I'm going to miss having you around all day, this summer spoiled me," I replied.

"Think you'll stay on through the winter?"

"You getting tired of me already?" I laughed.

"No, that will never happen ... it's just, do you mind being out of school and here with me?"

"Come on Tally, we're gonna make this a life for you and me. I have to help you with school and Granny isn't getting any younger you know, she needs me too."

"I just don't want you getting bored, the farm is pretty busy all winter but when I'm not there ... "

"Then I'll be thinking of when you are, don't worry about me."

"Well somebody should," A voice said behind us. Rick had come quietly, and I knew why.

"Hello again Rick ... what's on your mind?" I asked.

"You guys ... I mean are you ... ? What am I seeing here?" Rick asked.

"Sit down and I'll explain it," I said.

He sat on the bank beside me and I could feel Tally tense up, but this had to be addressed and Rick seemed open enough.

"Your brother and I are in love," I said. There, it was that simple.

"You're both gay?"

"I'm gay," Tally said. "Known that for years ... just didn't think you were interested in my secret." I could see he was trembling; this was a lot for him to handle.

"And you, how long have you known, Evan?"

"I didn't know until I met Tally," I said.

Rick just looked at me for a minute and then the beginnings of a smile crept to his lips.

"You saying my little brother seduced you?" Rick said, and now his face was really smiling.

"I love him, what do you think? I just never met anyone like him before, this is all so new to me," I said.

Again the moments of silence. "You gonna tell Dad?" Tally finally asked.

Rick shook his head. "No, not if this is what you want, Tally. Do you really love Evan?"

"Yes ... more than anything. Are you gonna keep our secret?"

Now Rick nodded. "I have to ... after what you've done for me. I'm sorry Tally; I haven't been a very good brother have I?"

"I was just a kid, Rick ... maybe now you'll think differently of me," Tally said.

"I do ... I better. Wow, so I suppose Granny knows, doesn't she?"

"She knows about the love ... and nothing else," I said. "You saw us yesterday, didn't you?"

"Yeah, sorry. I didn't mean to sneak up on you like that. I was pretty shocked, but you figured that out." Rick was starting to blush, the thought of what he had seen coming back to mind. "I ... I didn't know guys could do that stuff."

"You ever wonder how Marlene feels when she's in your arms, and then when you get carried away with the passion enough to make love?" Tally asked.

"No ... Suppose not, I just know my side of it," Rick said.

"Evan makes me feel incredibly passionate, and when we make love I see stars," Tally said. "It's like the whole world goes away, leaving just us two surrounded by the all the stars in the night sky. I have to love him, Rick. No one ever made me feel like that."

Rick's face was a sold red blush; Tally's words had completed the transformation. "And ... Well, I guess I saw that part, and then Evan returned the favor before I walked in on you. I just couldn't go away; I didn't know what to think."

"You saw two people in love, Rick ... that's all," I said.

"But ... I just don't get that carried away with Marlene; does that mean I don't love her? This whole gay thing confuses me, but I could see what you were sharing and it was ... it just looked so wonderful. "

It was my turn to smile. "Love is something you learn, Rick. Sex isn't the biggest part of what Tally and I share, I want him to love me for the rest of my life. Maybe Marlene isn't the one you need in your life, but you'll find that person someday. Love makes it hard to breathe, it's like a completely mind blowing ache in your heart. You'll know when it happens, I promise."

"My God ... that's what Granny told me last night, you were right about her," Rick said. "I never knew ... Well, that's all past now that Marlene isn't pregnant."

He looked at Tally and then back at me. "You're secret is safe with me, I won't ever tell on you. Just be careful, OK? I don't want either of you to get hurt by this."

"Thank you, Rick," Tally said.

"Too many people won't understand what you have, Tally. None of this is going to be easy for you guys if they find out. I'm not worried about you; I worry about what might happen. Having a gay brother is fine, I'll get used to it, and you haven't changed far as I can see. Just now you have someone to love and I'm not sure why ... but I envy that, can you understand?"

"Yes, I do," Tally said. "It took me an awfully long time to find Evan, I hope you don't have to wait that long to find your love."

"I have to get back," Rick said. "Barry has no idea where I am and that can't be a good thing."

He stood up to leave and Tally came over and threw his arms around Rick's waist. It was awkward, Tally was naked and Rick wasn't sure how to react, but he finally gave in and hugged back.

"I love my big brother too," Tally said.

Rick just nodded, let go and turned away, running back up the path into trees before Tally could see the tears in his eyes, but I saw them. It was the moment when I realized there was a bit of Tally inside his brother, something that would never leave.

Maybe it was why they played so hard against one another; Rick felt the challenge from this boy who was but a few steps behind on the pathway of life. Barry might be his twin but Rick felt more akin to Tally than anyone else. Maybe Rick had gay feelings at some point in life, something he would never openly express. But I didn't feel uncomfortable with Rick knowing I loved Tally, Barry was another matter entirely.

Tally sighed. "Well ... that was different."

"Different?" I asked.

"Not very often that I remember Rick being so open about his feelings. If I saw my little brother naked and sitting on a cock I don't know if I could be so easy about dealing with it, but he was."

"Tally, he would have reacted differently if he thought you were being hurt, Rick is actually very protective of you," I said.

"He envies me, I don't get it."

"We have love, he doesn't ... I don't think that means he wants to be gay," I said.

"I told you he and Barry did things when they were younger, I just wasn't old enough to understand," Tally said.

"You think it went beyond just fooling around?"

"I think Rick was screwing Barry, at least that's how it seemed to me. But Grandpa was around back then; I was too young to really know what was going on. They were only like eight or nine so it couldn't have been much like real sex."

"And when did you first discover orgasm?" I asked.

"Uh, maybe five or six when I started playin ... .Oh, I see what you mean. Rick got the feelings but not the results. OK, that's intense. But why did Barry let him do it?"

I smiled. "You already know the answer to that. Besides feeling good, I think Barry wanted Rick to accept him, to be his friend no matter what it took. It's the wrong reason to allow that to happen, but it was probably his way of thinking. I don't know what to say about Rick's behavior."

"Rick is a horn dog, maybe that's when it first began. It must have felt like he was screwing himself, they were much closer in looks back then. Eww, that's kinda sick," Tally said.

I shook my head. "No baby, it makes perfect sense. If Rick had feelings about other boys who else could he turn to except his twin? Maybe he did flirt with being gay at some point, we'll never know."

Being out here in the open didn't seem as private anymore, Rick had proven that. Tally and I walked back up the path a ways and then moved through the trees back towards the river. Going the other way would have taken us up behind the trailer where Miguel and Paulo lived, discovery by them would be worse.

We walked through the trees, skirting the various poison ivy plants that were a shiny red this time of year. We came back to the river about a quarter mile west from where we usually swam and here the trees grew right down into the water.

This big old oak was toppled over, probably during the storm the week before. But now the wide trunk offered us a seat beside the water. We sat and kissed ... a prelude to bigger and better things I hoped. In the distance I could hear the sounds of distant yells.

"Is someone on the river, it seems pretty late to be rafting?" I asked.

"That's the crowd over at baseball field, the high school is across the river and through those trees," Tally said. "That's were we went on the Fourth."

"I didn't know it was so close. Yeah, I suppose you have to go into town and then take the bridge across. So that's going to be your school, huh?"

"Yup, we're like next to last on the bus route, it's usually pretty full by the time they get to the end of our driveway. Archer Middle School is right next door to the high school, same bus and same bullshit."

"What's wrong with the bus?" I asked.

"The bus driver is a bitch. Mrs. Wright is about a hundred years old and so crabby I don't know why she does it. Maybe we'll have someone new this year. You could always drive me to school in the mornings."

"Why would I do that when there's a perfectly good bus to take you?" I asked.

Tally smiled. "Because we could do this ... "

And with that he kissed me again, running his hand down my stomach and sliding it into my overalls. I had to admit, his argument was pretty persuasive. And off came the overalls as our bodies melted together in that now familiar embrace.

Tally slid down my body until his knees rested on the ground and his face was in my lap, he licked my cock like it was some kind of frozen treat and then looked up at me with mischief in his eyes.

"So you gonna drive me to school?"

"I'll have chores Tally ... I don't see how ... " And I groaned as he slid my cock down his throat.

I couldn't fault his dedication to sucking my cock, and then his fingers grasped my balls and gently pull downwards. His mouth popped off my cock and he grinned, little devil.

"I'll make it worth your while." And he wrapped his wet lips around my balls.

His tongue lashed around and his mouth developed this incredible amount of suction, I was about to be castrated. But then he released my ball sac and it slapped back against my body.

"Jeez, be careful, baby," I groaned, and then came the teeth.

It felt like he was about to bite my cock off as he raked his teeth down the shaft until I filled his throat. Again with the supreme vacuum as he pulled back. Was he trying to drive me crazy? If so, it was working.

"Oh ... yeah, just suck it, baby," I moaned. And for once he listened.

His mouth was all over the head as his fingers stroked the shaft. Tally knew damn well how to drive me to the edge. The rubbing and sucking took me dangerously close, and then he stopped and sat back.

"So are we taking your Jeep to school or what?"

"Fuck, you little tease ... OK, I drive you," I said, almost laughing now.

He smiled. "Then I promise to do this every morning if you want." And with that said he went back down on me with such skill I was soon groaning my orgasm down his throat. Tally was a true cum junkie, he never missed a drop. Now it was my turn.

He stood up and I slid down the rough bark of the tree and lay my head back as I pulled his cock into my mouth. Tally leaned forward, placing his hands on the bark of the tree and began fucking my mouth.

Rick had stirred things up, I could feel the difference. Tally had teased, knowing full well I would drive him to school, how could I resist? And now I was jamming his cock down my throat as I grasped his butt and forcefully pulled him in.

I wanted him to overwhelm me, to use me ... and I couldn't understand why, it just felt like something I needed. I wanted him to dominate, much as Rick had when fucking Barry all those years ago. Tally had the power to hurt me, to choke me with his cock ... but of course he didn't.

Tally could indulge my little fantasy without hurting me, what had Rick done? Did Barry protest and find himself dominated? Rick could do that, I was sure. Barry wasn't assertive enough to completely say no, I felt in the same position with Tally. But I was loved and that made all the difference, Rick had not felt an ounce of love ... and that made me sad.

Tally seemed to sense my mood, probably wondering why I was being so brutal in what I was demanding of him. His thrusts became gentle and he slowed down to a moderate pace, pushing back against my hands, resisting the assault. I couldn't make him hurt me and that had been the test.

I slid my hands downwards, fingers grasping at his calf muscles and allowing Tally the control over his movements. His hands came to rest on my head as he ran his fingers through my hair and encouraged my participation in his loving touch. It was enough, the long steady groan rumbling from his throat brought him to orgasm, and I swallowed his precious seed.

His cock slowly withered and yet I didn't take my mouth away, I loved the feeling of it resting on my tongue. I looked up as he looked down and we locked eyes. Only then did he back away and remove his cock and my pacifier.

"What was that all about?" Tally asked.

"You play games, and you tease ... but you can't bring yourself to hurt me," I said, rising to my feet.

"Hurt you? No ... Never, why would I do that?"

I smiled. "You just wouldn't, and that's why we share love."

"It's Rick, isn't it? What were you thinking; you tried to make me choke you."

"I just discovered why we love and he doesn't," I said. "You won't cross that line and he has, probably many times. And all Rick ever wants is a love like we share ... isn't that incredibly sad?"

"But hurting someone doesn't show love at all, just the opposite," Tally said. "Now I'm confused."

"No, you have it exactly right; hurting someone is not the way to love. What he did with Barry was wrong; he only did it because he could. It was like using someone to get off and nothing more. If you thought you were hurting me you would never have achieved an orgasm, you would have pulled away. That's what love means, no amount of pain is worth your own pleasure, you just proved that."

"But Barry didn't scream, he just lay there and let it happen."

"There had to be some pain in the beginning, but he was past all that. When you saw them Rick had probably been doing it to him for a long time, Barry had just surrendered. He still does that and that's the scariest part. I don't know how he holds back the feelings; you would think he'd hate Rick by now."

"You think Rick still does it? No way," Tally said.

"He doesn't have sex with Barry, he doesn't need to. But he's never allowed Barry to stand up to him, Rick is still dominating him," I said. "What does Barry have, who does she turn to for love?"

"He hasn't had a girlfriend in a while and all of them that I met were real bitches. He couldn't have loved any of them, no one could. Now I see what you're saying, Rick really messed him up."

"Yeah, and I wonder just when he'll explode," I said.

We made our way back to the house and changed out of our working clothes, supper lay ahead, time to relax. The days had come and gone with certainty, the chores seemed like work instead of a learning experience. I wasn't bored, Tally took care of that ... I just wasn't challenged.

And so as our lives crept into August I was beginning to see the impending corn harvest as a final step to my education. Not that the work would be any less, but when Tally headed back to school I would work to keep my mind off his absence.

On an almost daily basis Jim went out to his fields to check on the corn, and then he checked the weather forecast. The fields had been planted weeks apart, they were maturing at different stages, but the watering kept it all healthy. We had little rain that first week of the month and then a few days of storms and showers before it began to dry out.

"We start to harvest tomorrow," Jim announced at supper one evening. The machines were ready, was I?

Corn was turned into kernels, some bagged and stored in the barn. The rest was taken in bulk to the Farmer's Co-op silos, it would only remain to be seen what price it would fetch. The work was beginning to point towards profit or loss, the latter being Jim's biggest worry, and now he had hope.

The mid-Western part of the country had endured flooding in late spring, leaving water in fields where corn was supposed to be planted. And yet even as farmers finally began to plant the storms returned wiping out the young plants and devastating production. All that while the south endured near drought conditions.

The price had gone through the roof on fears that there wouldn't be enough to meet the needs of the economy. Corn was used in everything, Jim was sitting pretty.

"Damn near eight dollars a bushel, that's incredible," Jim said.

"What's it normally?" I asked.

"Five to six is what we usually get; the wheat fetched three-sixty." And then he smiled. "Seems like you brought us luck this summer."

I might agree except I felt it was the other way round. But I wouldn't argue, farming was his game. We harvested corn, lots of corn. The golden yellow kernels slid up the conveyor belt into the waiting trucks and we kept on going.

Several fields were left untouched to dry out on the stalk, pig feed the intended destination. Tally and the brothers worked hard, and I was right there with them. In ten days we had the corn stored, enough to keep through winter, the rest off to market.

The fields now looked sad, bent stalks and mere stubble in a once proud sea of green leaves. It was the way things happened year after year, everything on the farm would be renewed come spring. Even the Reverend waxed philosophic in his sermon following the great harvest, and this time I listened.

"The bounty of the soil has been taken, thanks be to God," He began. "In fall we plan our days with a mind to the coming winter. It takes a keen mind to look ahead towards the spring when once again you will plant and pray the rains give life to the crops.

"Imagine God at his harvest, for we are his crop, for good or for bad each of us faces the final harvest. Will the baby born of a spring reap the rewards of a good life before winter embraces him and brings him back to the Lord? That is a decision between us and God, for he only gives life, he doesn't make you live it.

"The responsibility of feeding our lives until we grow strong and healthy, both physically and spiritually is ours, we are the farmers in our own family. For if a father is wrongful to his family he loses his crop, just like a careless farmer might. If a mother doesn't see the need of her children then she too is guilty of neglect, not just on Earth but in the eyes of God.

"And each of you young ones must follow behind, sowing your own seeds someday, starting your own crop. Will you be good farmers when the time comes? Will you stand up and bring forth a family that sees the source of their wealth and happiness as the gift of God? You will if the roots of that faith have been planted deep and been nurtured properly.

"To each farmer in this room I say we all know that storms approach when God decides to test our faith. Will you be ready to protect your crops when the time comes? Can you deny that God's love for his chosen people, this human race we belong to, is the source of our success in life? And when we have love, for the crops, for our families and for God we reap the benefit ten fold.

"It takes planning and toil to be a good farmer, it takes much more to be a good parent. For if God can give his only son for our salvation, how can we cherish our children any less? There is no need for us to sacrifice a single child since God has done that for us. And as the school bell rings again in just a few short days, look at each and every one of your children in wonder.

"They are the future, of our lives and our family, they must be taught to read and write, but their education in the love of God means so much more. I see their faces here today and I marvel at how these fine young boys and girls have grown. You have been good farmers and parents, your crop prospers. I pray for that continued success as should you. In Jesus name, Amen."

"Amen," Came the response.

I really, really liked this guy. To each person in the room his message went out and was received with an open mind, there was no need to pound it into anyone's brain. These were strong minded men and women, and much of that strength came from faith.

The Reverend seemed like someone I could talk to, and as of yet I had no need. Would he accept me for who I am? What if he knew Tally was involved, would that change his opinions? Tally had a better level of faith than I did even though it was not something we had shared very deeply. I was aware that his youth gave him a need to believe, and yet his being gay would challenge that faith someday. I just hoped it didn't happen soon.

I shook the Reverend's hand and thanked him for the sermon as we left the church, his smile seemed warm and sincere. I had seen him interact with his own family and he seemed to be a good parent. In some ways this church and these people were his family as well. His duty to them was as God's messenger, and I thought he was doing a fine job.

Yeah, Tally and school. I wanted to see his text books, that would guide my steps in tutoring him.

"I hate carrying all those books around, especially on the bus," Tally said when I asked him to bring them home.

"So how do you do homework without them?"

"Most of the homework is on worksheets they hand out, multiple choice questions," Tally said.

"And where do you get the information to answer the questions?" I asked.

"We talk about most of it in class that day, I remember a lot. But the answers are there on the paper anyway, it's pretty easy."

"And what if there's something you want to know, or should know that the teacher forgot to put on that worksheet, how would you even find it?" I asked.

"I dunno ... ask?"

"Lord help us," I said. "Do you even read the information in the books or are they just there to fill up your locker?"

"Evan, I am not dumb," Tally yelped.

"I still want to see those books," I said. And I was sticking to that.

Tuesday came and I drove Tally to school after the milking chores were done. So up at four, milk until seven, a quick shower, breakfast and we were out the door. His homeroom started at eight-fifteen, we were there by ten after.

"Thank you for the ride ... I love you," Tally said.

"I love you too ... hmm, suppose a kiss here would be a bad move," I said.

"Hell yeah, we should have done that on the bridge where no one could see us," Tally said.

"Tomorrow we will, have a good day, baby."

"See ya after school," Tally said, and then he was gone.

I looked up at the brick edifice, so typical of all schools built here. Thank God, that's over and done. I drove back to the house; Tally would take the bus home. Granny offered me another coffee when I walked in.

"Get our boy off to school all right?" She asked.

"Yeah, those places give me the creeps now," I laughed.

"At least you graduated, I never did."

"Granny, I'm surprised ... how far did you go?" I asked.

"Tenth grade, then I had to go find work. My daddy lost his job at the furniture plant, someone had to bring in the money for groceries," She said.

"You ever want to finish school?" I asked.

"Yes, but I don't see the need now. Doesn't matter, I would have been out the following year because of Jessie. I appreciate you sending Rick to talk with me. Sometimes I wonder about that boy."

"Not like you wondered about Tally I hope," I said.

"I was something like that, Rick is just so impulsive." She said. "It's gonna get him in hot water one of these days."

"It almost did ... I think Marlene laid a trap for him."

"That sounds about like her, they aren't even church folk."

"How do you think Rick and Barry get along," I asked.

"Tolerable, they've had some bad days," She said. "Something I should know about?"

"I don't know if it matters anymore, I sure don't want to be spreading gossip about either of them."

"I suppose you're referring to what Rick used to do to Barry when they were boys, Tally told me." Granny frowned. "I just hope that doesn't come back to bite either of them."

"I didn't know Tally had said anything."

"He was just a little fella, maybe five, but he had to tell his Granny about it cause it didn't make sense to him. I suppose he's forgotten about telling me."

"He has, but he told me. I think it was wrong for Rick to dominate Barry like that, and he's still got that attitude even if they don't do anything like that ever again," I said.

"Rick is vain, and vanity is a sin in the eyes of God. Barry's big enough to stand up for hisself now, if only he would," She said. "I think Rick enjoyed putting himself in that position over Barry back then, maybe a little too much of that activity went on. I wouldn't know about that, you might have a different view."

I blushed just enough for her to chuckle. "I know, I'm sorry," She said. "I imagine your relationship with Tally has grown a good deal since the last time we spoke about it. I don't know how that works either, but Tally seems happy."

"Granny ... I can't talk about that with you, it isn't proper."

"I'm just teasing anyways, so why this sudden interest in Rick?" She asked.

I should have known. "He caught Tally and I down at the river, he knows about us."

Her eyes focused in on me. "Is he planning to talk about it?"

"Said he wouldn't, I just don't know how good that promise is. I don't know Rick that well, I'm more worried about keeping Tally focused on school."

"You do that, Rick will take care of himself," She said. "I see you seemed to pay attention in church, and that was a pretty good sermon."

"Yes it was, so I see you have winter squash and cabbage planted, you have a good cabbage recipe?"

We talked for a while and then I went back to work. I found myself paired up with Miguel who was busy looking through the herd for sick animals. Unpleasant though it might be, the deposits they left behind were often the first indicator of a problem. Jim and Miguel could spot a sick cow fairly easily.

Miguel was a gentle soul, an experienced farm hand. He laughed as he told me stories of past years here on the Winslow place, and even what he saw as the difference between Jessie and Jim as managers. I was astonished to realize he had been coming here for over a decade, but then he explained why.

"It is these people, I am not treated as a servant here," Miguel said. "At home I have four cows and some chickens, my wife and youngest boy look after them when I am away. I would not wish to have a place so big as this, but I feel at home here as well. Mr. Jessie was a kind man, their loss was also mine."

"So you've been here a long time," I said. "How did Jim learn so much, was it just by doing the work?"

"Yes, and Mr. Jessie was very strict about making him do everything. He was a patient man, always explaining the right way things must happen. Mr. Jim make a mistake and he would be told to do it again, only Mr. Jessie would do it with him to be sure he understand the right way. I learn much from just seeing what they do."

Then he laughed. "Is much the same with you I think? Why does a city boy wish to be a farmer?"

"I have no wish to spend my life on a farm, it's the knowledge I seek," I said.

"Ahh, then you have come to the right place for this, we will teach you," Miguel said.

And teach he did. In spring the grasses in the pasture came back to life, cows eat an enormous amount of the sweet grass at that time of the year. I imagine after a diet of dry hay and grains all winter they must be overjoyed at seeing all that grass, but therein lays the problem.

I'd sat through high school science class, I knew all about the digestive system of a cow, four stomachs and all that jazz. But green grass is hard to break down in a cow's system no matter how much they like to eat it, besides producing methane gas it also introduced bacteria. Now at this late date in summer the pastures had been well combed back by the herd, but a cow would eat just about anything that grew.

The pastures were under constant observation for plant life that sprang up, if it was bad for a cow it had to be removed before the animals got into it, and they would. Despite being fed a good diet of grass, Jim had a ton of cow mash prepared. Made rich with corn, alfalfa, soy and vitamins, the mixture was part of their regular diet. It was a wonder that they ever got into eating the plant life that could harm them.

But the younger cows didn't know any better, and pigweed was the farmer's bane hereabouts. Miguel took me outside the pasture and showed me a sample of the plant growing along the fence line.

"We have this plant when the ground is dry," He explained. "There are chemicals inside this plant that will make a cow sick and if she eats too much she will die. So we look for this plant and others, some will show in the cow remains or if she throw it back up. Always keep your eyes open for signs."

We walked the pastures looking for the cow that had left behind a rather liquid waste and he spotted one of the Jersey varieties, of course it had to be Rita. She seemed to recognize me and wandered over; Miguel smiled when I scratched her head and slipped the rope around her neck.

"She knows you, this will make her last days happy," He said.

"She really has to be put down? Is it just old age? She hasn't given milk in quite some time," I said.

Miguel looked in her eyes and examined her hindquarters. "Her stomach fails to digest, eyes are cloudy and you can see the remains of the mess on her rear legs, she is sick. We will take her to the shed and see what Mr. Jim says."

Rita followed along, led by the rope as we took her to the isolation shed which was little more than an enclosed pen for potentially sick cows. I made sure she had water but Miguel said no food, not yet anyway.

Life and death affected me the same way it would any human, it made me sad. I was sure Rita had given years of service to the farm, adding her prized milk in with the others of her kind. Her fate was in Jim's hands, I would only be there as an observer of the cycle of life, poor Rita.

Miguel and I went back on patrol, observing the young calves born last spring as they followed their mothers around. I'd seen young horses on my Uncle Harry's farm; they were frisky and playful with one another, not so cows. They kept to the pasture with their mothers and I had little chance to interact with them. Now they just stared as we walked by, their turn would come.

By lunchtime Jim had decided Rita had to go, assigning the task to Rick and Barry. He explained that her sides were becoming lean, she would waste away if she couldn't digest food. I helped load her on the utility trailer and watched as Rick drove off; her final trip was to the slaughterhouse.

Tally was back at three-thirty, bubbling about his first day at school and the teachers he had. But he fell right into the afternoon milking cycle and shrugged when I told him about Rita. It wasn't a heartless reaction, just all a part of his life growing up on a farm. But I carried the thoughts about her through the rest of my day and tried not to be sad.

Tally had a stack of books and after supper I looked them over. I almost groaned aloud, these were the same crappy textbooks I had endured, would they never change? He probably wouldn't have homework this first week, even teachers seemed reluctant to get back into the grind that quickly.

"Mrs. Kaiser is my English teacher, she's cool, but I have Mr. Peters for math, not cool," Tally explained. "And Mrs. Wright still drives the bus, they ought to retire her."

"Things will settle down once you get back into the groove," I said. "I imagine it's still the farm boys versus the city boys?"

"Oh yeah, but I'm in ninth grade, the older kids act like we don't exist."

"They will for a while, it's like chickens," I said. "You aren't part of the pecking order yet."

"Jerry is all excited; they're going to Jacksonville this weekend, because Uncle Tom comes home on Saturday. It makes him happy, I'm just relieved."

"Good, Jerry will get his father back. Looking forward to meeting your uncle," I said.

"Yeah, they'll probably be over here Sunday for dinner I suppose. I'm sure Uncle Tom misses Granny's cooking, I bet he's sick of soldier food."

"You think he's been eating nothing but canned rations? I bet they have a nice mess hall, I read about that on the internet," I said.

"You did? Show me," Tally said. And so we surfed the net for an hour before bedtime. Granny was already planning Tom's homecoming meal and Jim seemed pleased his brother would be back in time to harvest his own acreage. It had been Tom's land that they had planted last spring, watered and tended all year. The corn there was destined to wither on the stalks and dry out to become pig food.

I supposed that when Jessie passed that each of the two brothers had been given a portion of the land. Jim had stayed here in the homestead part of the farm and by then Tom already had his house across the road on forty or so acres. But he planted his open spaces as well; it's what farmers did with their land.

We settled in for the night, listening to the sound of Rick and Barry arguing about something in the room next door. I finally heard their bedroom door slam and the sound of boots clomping down the stairs. If one of them had left out I was pretty sure it would be Barry.

I had not paid much attention to their lives together, only recently focusing on Rick. But I could imagine the relationship between the brothers was not always pleasant, their past dictated that. If Barry was at a stage of fighting back against Rick's domination then I wanted to root for him, I just didn't know him that well. But I could change all that.

On to Chapter Fourteen

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